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The
race for 2002's worst film is over--the winner is "Kung
Pow: Enter the Fist". It will take one hell of a
terrible movie to overthrow this one from the throne.
This could also be one of the worst films I have seen in my
entire life.
Trying to capitalize on the success of spoofs like "Scary
Movie", "Not Another Teen Movie", and I guess "Mister
Magoo", this film is a total piece of crap. Steve
Oedekerk (who also acts as director for this nightmare) plays
The Chosen One, injected into a 1976 ninja flick.
Boring. Guess what--the bad guy is a ruthless prick
named Master Pain (aka Betty). That is pretty much all
you need to know about the plot to also derive that this was
pathetic and worthless for everyone involved. I would
not be surprised if Steve Oedekerk never gets another
directing gig in Hollywood again. In fact, I am writing
every studio in Hollywood and personally asking them to make
sure I am never subjected to that kind of torture again
(torture being an understatement). I think maybe
the justice system should do away with capital punishment and
just lock really terrible inmates in a room together and make
them watch "Kung Pow" for a couple of weeks
non-stop. If that doesn't send the inmates begging for
forgiveness and reform, then I don't know what will.
I
actually found my head starting to hurt from the moronic jokes
and lack of intelligence in this film. I would recommend
the Tom Arnold film "The Stupids" to everyone I meet
if it meant "Kung Pow" would be obliterated from
this planet. At least Tom Arnold made "I'm My Own
Grandpa" sounds pretty funny in "The Stupids".
Who wants to watch a cow shoot milk from it's udders in a
tacky ripoff of "The Matrix"? Not I, says the
pissed off movie goer.
Now, I always try to find something enjoyable about a film,
despite how utterly, utterly tasteless and faulty it may be.
What did I find? The only thing good about it was that
it was short. Had it been any longer, I might have just
left the theater and demanded a refund from the scum sucking
theater manager who decided to show a film which only ended up
grossing as much money as a Central Park restaurant on a
Thursday night. This movie blew.
-- Billy
Ray
( 0 out of 4 pops )
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